Can you practice Tantra when single?

Can you practice Tantra when single?

This week we answer a viewer’s question “Can I practice Tantra while single”?

When folks ask us this question they are usually thinking of Neo-Tantra, which often portrays Tantric practice as more of a “couples intimacy exercise” than a several thousand year old spiritual tradition. But even Neo-Tantra has aspects of solo practice woven into the tapestry of its teachings.

My introduction into Tantra was under the umbrella of the lineage-based practices of Tibetan 5 Element Tantra. I learned to practice Tantra as a non-sexual meditation practice before I had any clue these methods could be used sexually.

“Tantra” is a rich and profound spiritual tradition that dates back thousands and thousands of years. There are many aspects to “authentic” Tantric practice, which depending upon your lineage of practice, and your Teacher, may consist of; rituals, ancient texts, books, visualizations, breath work, movement practices, philosophies, etc etc.

From a lineage-based standpoint, there will be aspects of your Tantra practice that are best done solo, best done in partnership, and even practices that are best performed as a community of practitioners, aka Sangha.

In short, the answer to the question “can I practice Tantra while single?”  is – YES! Absolutely! And when practicing authentic, lineage-based Tantra, you absolutely SHOULD be practicing solo Tantra whether you are in a relationship or not!

When it comes to sexual Tantra, solo sexual yoga practice is also very, very important. In fact, I was required to practice the sexual methods of Tibetan 5 Element Tantra SOLO for weeks before I was invited to practice them in union with another.

Just as there are many aspects and layers to non-sexual tantra practice, there are many aspects and layers to sexual Tantra practice. Authentic sexual tantra practice may also consist of rituals, visualizations, meditations, and breathwork, in conjunction with sexual stimulations and the cultivation of pleasure.

Consist, joyful, devoted PRACTICE is required in order effectively engage in, much less master, the art of authentic sexual Tantra and the BEST person to practice with is YOURSELF.

From a traditional standpoint, solo self-pleasure has been a foundation of Buddhist sexual Tantra from the beginning. There are numerous texts in this tradition which refer to practitioners cultivating their “sexual fire” for advanced solo sexual practices which are referred to as “the inner yogas”.

In fact, the 1st Lama in Tibet was a woman named Yeshe Tsogyal who helped establish Buddhism in Tibet through sexual union practices with her consort, Guru Rinpoche, a.k.a Padmasambhava. In one particular text Yeshe is described as “covering her naked body with gold dust and stirring her mandala (vulva) with her fingers, while Padmasambhava arose as the great Heruka with his vajra (penis) in hand”.

This is quite literally a description of mutual masturbation between these two enlightened Tantric Yogis.

For us as laypeople, solo Tantra can be an extremely supportive practice for our own personal, sexual and spiritual healing.

For men and people with peni, solo sexual Tantra practice can help you:

  • Work through premature ejaculation issues
  • Work through ED
  • Heal sexual abuse trauma
  • Heal circumcision trauma
  • Feel more connected to your body and emotions
  • Separate orgasm from ejaculation and become multi-orgasmic
  • Build confidence, self connection, and self esteem


For women and people with vulvas, solo sexual Tantra practice can help you:

  • Connect with your body at your pace and on your terms
  • Feel empowered in your own pleasure
  • Access and awaken heighten states of bliss
  • Overcome shame and guilt
  • Explore and awaken your full capacity for pleasure
  • Nourish your heart and mind
  • Heal trauma and blocks to bliss


And, when weaving in the energy body yoga of Tibetan 5 Element Tantra, solo sexual tantra practice allows you to nourish and heal your energy body AND cultivate enlightened states of consciousness- with the pleasure you generate in your own body!

It’s so very empowering and awesome.


Watch the video below for more!

Want More?

Learn lineage-based Tantra and how to practice Tantra while single in our Membership Program!

Choose the Female Orgasm Intensive if you are a Yoni Owner or the Ejaculation Mastery Program if you are a Lingam Owner

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